Duck Dynasty: How Then Should We Christians Deal With This?

It has become almost a national fascination. In the first day I hear about it on HLN, I become outraged that an individual's right to free speech was supposedly being violated and censored. He had been suspended from his TV show? What? Over making a few comments? Without even being a fan of the show of the question or actually reading the offensive comments for myself, I made the supposed victim's picture my Facebook profile pic for a few hours. That evening, I saw a Facebook post that made it clear that many of us had "jumped the gun" and been duped by the media hype about this supposedly persecuted individual. After a quick Google search and reading the actual comments, I removed the Facebook profile pic. Still, some in my friends list still continue to champion "the cause" and several have continued to keep the said person's pic up.

What is Duck Dynasty all about?

First of all, I'm not a fan of the Duck Dynasty show or of any TV show, for that matter. There are news talk shows that I view when others in my household turn them on. The eve before that day, Duck Dynasty actually came to my attention in the form of a Facebook message inbox request to sign a Change.org petition for a person named Phil Robertson, who was still totally unfamiliar to me. Only when HLN covered him and his situation the next day did I sign the petition, and change my Facebook profile pic to Robertson. I did that because he had been suspended by A & E, according to HLN, over making controversial remarks about accepting Christ as one's Savior, and that homosexuality, like all other sins, will be judged by God in the form of sending the sinning persons to a place called hell. We in the Christian community are, today, must reckon with the GLBT issue, knowing that the family has been re-defined as anything we want it to be, whether between man and wife, unmarried people, or people of the same sex. Sadly, we in the Christian community are almost as divided about the GLBT issue as the general community. Thus this show is, according to my understanding, a now controversial reality show that focuses on "Christian right" views, and has support among those who pride themselves on holding "Conservative family values." I'm not aware of anyone in my family or among in our social circles, who have ever mentioned that they view this show or are its fans.

Why the Controversy Over This Show?

The controversy about Duck Dynasty as almost as divisive as the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin case had been (and still is). The differences exist along party lines, and less so, among racial and class lines. Robertson had denounced, in no uncertain terms, homosexuality as a lifestyles, lumping it with other sins, including bestiality (sexual intercourse with animals). This offends GLBT persons as well as their allies. Also, Robertson made very hurtful slurs about Blacks, proceeding to opine that they were actually happier when they were segregated, and so-called entitlements did not exist for them "to depend on." This caused an uproar in the Black community and among their allies. Those slurs were un-Christlike, ungodly, and totally un-called for! Many of us in the Christian community, at least initially, took up the Duck Dynasty cause because of Robertson's stance against GLBT lifestyles. He remains seen as a hero by loyal supporters of "conservative religious right" views. It is all viewed as an illustration of "the culture war" between "liberal Democrats" and "conservative Republicans." We all know that the GLBT issue is a "hot button" controversy, hitting upon core beliefs of how we view love and the family. This holds as true among us in the Christian community as among those in the general community, as we are just as affected as we face our culture. We know that talk of racism is controversial and can be intense and seen as "race baiting" to merely address the race issue. Duck Dynasty is a symptom, not a cause, or our divided US.

What Does This Mean For Us As Christians?

We Christians need to realize that societal controversies, including Duck Dynasty, are just symptoms of what is wrong with us. We know that sin is the ultimate problem, though the world calls it other things. We may like to call it a "culture war," and denounce the moral decay that we see around us. But are we in a "culture war"? Are we actually in a spiritual war? Maybe instead of focusing on the moral ills that we oppose, we should focus on sharing, exalting, and shouting out the love, truth, glory, and awesomeness of the God Whom we love! Yes, we are to hate evil and to speak out against it in appropriate situations, as we sense God's guidance to do that. Those of you Christians who support GLBT rights and feel that "the Christian right" have gotten extremist and hateful do have a point! Too many GBLT people have ended their lives because they felt unloved, judged, and condemned by God and by Christians. Delivery of a hard-hitting message, such as the teaching of human sin and its consequences, must be delivered with compassion and great care! Failure to do this only turns off people, and they have every right to castigate us Christians as unloving and judgmental. But I kindly ask you who call yourself "Christian liberals" who support "GLBT equal rights" to read the Scriptures with an open mind about what God really says about GLBT lifestyles, in the New Testament book of Romans. But back to Duck Dynasty, we Christians should do our research about what Robertson actually said before hailing him as a hero or a persecuted victim.

How Then Should We Respond?

We ought to respect those who disagree with us about Duck Dynasty and about Robertson, As Christians bound by the Bible, we ought to search the Scriptures (like the NT book of Romans), to see what God says about GLBT lifestyles. We know that racism is a sin and we have to stop pretending that it is dead. We all believe in the right to free speech, and most people understand Duck Dynasty to be about this. But is it? Have we considered that we may be getting distracted from far more serious problems that actually affect us, unlike Duck Dynasty? Or do we actually, in a way, enjoy and derive entertainment from the controversy and the element of scandal in the whole matter? We in the US face the stark reality that our nation may deploy troops into South Sudan, one of the most dangerous spots in the world. Children and adults continue to go missing and many are killed daily, by a wide variety of means. Every day, three children die from child abuse. We Christians should face the sad fact that daily, hourly, and minute by minute, people die without Christ. I can go on and on. This is not to mention what goes on throughout the rest of the world! In light of this, maybe we should refocus, whatever our views of Duck Dynasty is, on the people and issues we love, instead of what we oppose. As I write, Robertson has been accepted back onto his show, which I know will not end the controversy. Many of us thrive on scandal or controversy. Is this not so?

What do you think?

The above photo of Phil Robertson is provided by his Facebook page, and can be found here.

Is the Christmas Holiday Truly Christian?

December 25 is, of course, the day that is widely observed or celebrated as Christmas Day. Yes, the day is officially over, but the holidays are still here and New Year's Day is almost upon us. That evening, on my Christ-centered Facebook page, I reposted a status update from another user, a poem depicting a professing Christian's anguish over being rejected by Christ on Christmas Eve, and that He had returned then. The imaginary professor of faith was aghast over being "left behind" because he had not been watching for Christ's return. I posted this on my Christian Facebook page; within minutes, users expressed anger at the post. After a barrage of angry comments, the original poster asked me to remove the post (as she had reposted it from yet someone else). So I did, posting a status update that confirmed that I did that. Over the past months, I have observed that there are sharp divisions amongst many brothers and sisters in Christ about whether this day ought even to be celebrated or observed. The passions run very strong about this in the Christian community, because it hits at core beliefs about God and what we believe the Bible says about holidays, tradition and Christian discipleship.

Why the Controversy About the Christmas Holiday Among Christians?

1). Pagan Origins. Research indicates that this day has roots having nothing to do with the Person of Christ.

2). Commercialism. It's self-evident that this time of the year incites greed, materialism and an excuse to indulge our lust to "lay up for ourselves" things, and to spend, spend, and spend on our families and ourselves. By showering many presents on our children, we teach them to think of themselves as consumers.

3). Hedonism. We use this time of the year as an excuse to "pig out" on food and alcohol. Is this not so? It isn't for nothing that we have coined the term "holiday food."

4). Traditions. We have practically made a religion of putting up lights, Christmas trees and organizing once-a-year family get-togethers among people we often see only at this time and may not even like. Those who offend by not adhering to this "religion" are often castigated as Scrooges. Never mind that they may not participate solely because of their own convictions.

5). The Santa Claus phenomenon. We parents tell children about this imaginary character, misleading them, and then wonder why, when we have to "break the news" that he is not real, that our children may struggle with believing that God and Christ are real.

6). Idolatry. We can't even pinpoint when God Incarnate was born into this world and nothing in the Bible indicates that we are called to celebrate Christ's birth. We ARE called to commemorate His death in the form of Holy Communion.

7). Causing unneeded stress because of unrealistic expectations. How many of us stress ourselves out trying to "find the perfect gifts" for loved ones? Hosting elaborate get-togethers? How many people, in pain to begin with over life situations, find their pain intensified at this time of the year?

How Then Should We As Christians Respond?

Those among our brothers and sisters in Christ who shun this holiday altogether have very valid reasons for their commitment and total abandonment to Christ. Even if we as Christians don't feel called to shun Christmas altogether, there are many lessons to learn where we can downsize our traditions and festivities, and greatly simplify this time of the year. We can still enjoy this time of the year, show our loved ones how much they mean to us, and please God. He does not want to be a "wet blanket" on our fun! Cut back on festivities. Lower expectations. Reduce spending. Simplify hosting preparations. Above all, respect our brothers and sisters in Christ who differ from us, and remember that it is all about the Person of Christ!

This is an unbiased article about the origin of this holiday.

This is an article, with links, outlining the actual origins of Christmas.

The photo at the top of this post is courtesy of MorgueFile.com and can be found here.

My Holiday Wish: A Little Bit of Your Time To Show Me Your Support

I know that this is the busiest time of the year, with all the stresses of this holiday season making so many of us feel pressured to do it all, so that our families and our children will "have a decent Christmas." Or, if you are one of those whose at a rough patch in your life, especially financially, you are afraid and depress, right? I have a holiday wish appeal, but it should not stress you out as I'm not asking you for a penny. I'm only asking for a little bit of your time, and it would mean a lot to me. I'm appealing for your support, brothers and sisters in Christ.

What Am I Asking You For?

I'm asking you to show me your support for this blog, or for materials that I have included here. I know that so many of you have shown your support in different ways, by signing my autism petition, and circulating this petition. Many of you have visited one or more of my Facebook pages and "liked" them. Many of you have hit one of the "Follow" or "Subscribe" options at this BlogSpot, and have become regular followers. My holiday wish is to see this BlogSpot continue to grow. I have set it up to help the general public, and with your ongoing support, I can help more people and help them more effectively than I am now. This particular BlogSpot is for you in the Christian community, but it's for any visitor who is interested in God, Christ, and spiritual things.

Simple Ways To Show Me Your Support & Help Spread the Love & Truth of God To More People

1). Hit the "Follow" button that floats at the top of your screen as you scroll down this page, to become a follower of this blog.

2). Hit one of the multiple "Subscribe" options on this blog, to get my updates in your email inbox or in a Feed reader. It's FREE!

3). If you have not done so yet, please sign my autism petition at Change.org. If you have signed it, please send invitations from the site, so that others can sign, too.
4). If you have not done so yet, please sign my autism petition at SignOn.org. If you have signed it, please send invitations from the site, so that others can sign, too!

5). You can visit my God-centered Facebook page, to "like" it and/or to circulate it. I'm looking to keep this page growing, reaching more people with the message of God's grace!

6). You can visit my static page on this BlogSpot, which houses all 7 of my Facebook pages with "like boxes." With just 7 clicks on each box, you can "like" all of the pages without visiting any of them. You can also find them on my homepage and do this same thing there.

7. You can visit my static page on this BlogSpot, which houses my autism petition on widgets from Change.org and SignOn.org; you can sign both of them there, and share them too. All that can be done without visiting either site.

8). You can visit my static page on this BlogSpot, which contains a brief survey where you can give me your honest feedback on how I'm doing here, and tell me what you would like to see. This would help me know what you need and want!

9). Comment on any post. I wish that Blogger had a better commenting system, and that you did not have to set up an account to post a comment on a Blogger blog. I have no control over this, but I hope to figure out how to change or improve this commenting system, if I can.

10). If you like any post or this BlogSpot, please share! I have set up many "share" options.

Mobile phone visitors, I have not forgotten you! I hope to find out ways to make this blog fit all screens. Blogger, unfortunately, does not make that easy. I hope to resolve things on my end, so you can enjoy this BlogSpot too. I plan to set up a website and hope to link it to this blog, and make changes that will make this BlogSpot better so I can help more people, and help them more effectively! Warm wishes to each of you, my brothers and sisters in Christ, over this holiday season!

Sincerely, in Christ's Love & Grace,

Lisa DeSherlia

The first photo that is found at the top of this post is by "natbell" and it can be found here; the second photo at the top of this post is by "Alvimann" and it can be found here. Both these photos are courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

Christian Friends, You Can Show Autistic People A FREE Christmas Gift of Your Support!

What Am I Asking For?

Dear brothers and sisters in Christ, Christmas is the time for giving. You know that. Actually, all year we are to give of ourselves and what we have. But we focus on this at this time of the year. I would like to see you show support for the autism community, and it will not cost you a cent, only a little of your time. I have set up an autism petition at Change.org over two years ago, and I had set it up at SignOn.org about a year ago. In it, I appeal to the US Congress and to the US President to send funds to all 50 states so states can set up affordable autism services for all those who want or need them.

Why Is This So Important?

Autism is a lifelong neurological disorder that affects the way a person sees himself, others, and the world. It affects how the autistic person relates to others. Levels of function range from the "high-functioning" Asperger's Syndrome to more severe forms of autism where an autistic person deals with cognitive and behavioral challenges. Every autistic person's autism is unique; autism cannot be stereotyped by the well-known "Rain Man" image in the Dustin Hoffmann film. Many autistic persons need no services, but far more, especially children, need affordable services. Without these services they cannot get officially diagnosed; without that diagnosis, it's legally impossible to access any form of autism support services. Hence, I have created a petition calling for those services for those who want but can't afford them.

Why Do We Christians Need To Be Concerned?

First of all, God loves and cares for all of us, and that includes autistic persons of all ages. He wants us to show His love to all people, as much as we can. Also, autistic adults and parents with autistic children have felt unwelcome in most Christian congregations, and I know that many still do. As the mom of a beautiful, precious daughter with diagnosed autism, and as a person who is suspected to have an ASD myself due to my past and present challenges, I have known this anguish of feeling unwelcome by a number of people in the Christian community. You take a small but important first step (depending on your connection with autism) by signing my autism petition, which I'm making available on widgets here, so you can more easily sign it and share it without leaving this blog to go to Change.org or to SignOn.org. Your support means a lot to us in the autism community!

Always in Christ,

Lisa DeSherlia

Please Sign This Petition Here

Petitions by Change.org|Start a Petition »

Thank You For Sharing Your Support and God's Love!

Both images at the top are courtesy of MorgueFile.com. The first image is found here & the second image is found here.

Give A Child A Gift That Gives All Year Long

What Is the Problem With This Time of the Year?

It is that time of the year, the time when those of us parents, even we Christian parents, are hitting the stores to buy our children the gifts they may have wanted all year long. In this digital age, we parents are buying our children, at ever-younger ages, devices like iPods, iPads, cell phones, even Smartphones, tablets, even laptop computers. We want them to have all that their peers have! After all, our children may wail, "But Mom and Dad! All the other kids have one! Do you want me to be left out?" We don't want our children to be left out! Aside from the safety issues of getting these devices (aside from regular cell phones) in light of them running data that can make minors vulnerable to predators, there's the sheer material this all teachers our children. We Christians know that our Savior warns us not to "Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth" and to "Beware of covetousness, for the abundance of life is not found in wealth." Yes, my spouse and I can relate to this cultural pressure as we are dealing with these same pressures to get "the best" for our daughter.

What Can We Do About This?

This past week, at our worship service, the sermon topic was titled, "It Isn't Your Birthday!" In other words, we behave as though this time of the year were our birthday (I'm not talking about those who DO have birthday at this time or on Christmas Day). It's reflected in how, with astounding frenzy, we hit the stores in search of the best deals. There's nothing wrong with wanting to show our love for family or close friends by giving them gifts. But don't we take it too far and get into materialism when we lavish our money on family or friends, giving our children toys or items they may enjoy today but be bored with tomorrow? By such behavior, we betray that we forget that we serve a God Whose nature is to give, give, give, all year long. There is nothing in His Word that commands us to get caught up in this yearly materialistic frenzy to celebrate all these festivities. We are told, though, to "Be not conformed to the world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind." In last week's sermon, we were challenged, "What is on Jesus' wish list? What kind of gifts would make Him happy?" I do not think any of us who have even a casual knowledge of the Person of Christ or the Bible, would have trouble answering that question. In Scripture and in the life of Jesus, God reveals Himself as a giving God and that He wants us to give, every day of the year. At this time of the year, this means that He wants us to focus on what we can give, give, and give.

How Does Helping Fight World Poverty Figure In?

As many of us parents, guardians and others in in North America and Europe seek to lavish gifts on our children to give them what our culture has convinced us, is "a Christmas they must have," there are countless children throughout Asia, Africa and other parts of the world whose only thought is to survive. Many times, they don't have access to clean drinking water. This leaves people, especially children, vulnerable to deadly diseases of all kinds. So many of these people don't know if they will have anything to eat today, or if they can feed their children. Fathers often can't provide for their children, and can't send them to school. Women often can't read and can't get any pre-natal care during pregnancy. Celebrating on birthdays or holidays with festivities or gift-giving, is often unthinkable. Precious children start out with hopes and dreams, which their harsh circumstances soon cruelly crush to hopelessness. That is, if many even survive. Many children don't even live to see their 5th birthday. As most of us know but feel uncomfortable thinking about, many of these children die of starvation before them. God tells us, "If you have the world's goods but do not give to those in need, how does the love of God dwell in you?" Indeed, how can it?

How Can Child Sponsorship Combat World Poverty?

When we sponsor individual children, this allows relief workers to focus on a sponsored child's physical, social, emotional, and developmental needs. The child gets an education and is motivated and empowered to become a responsible and contributing member of his or her community and giving back far more than has been poured into them. Child sponsorship also helps the child's family and entire community as child sponsorship nonprofits serve their sponsored children's families and communities. When we sponsor a child, he or she is given hope, help and knows that they are cared for. This empowers them to much better development and their families are given hope in knowing that often tremendous struggles to provide for their own child are being assisted by others who also care. The family and community of the sponsored child also get help as an extension of the help being provided to the sponsored child. Reaching out in love to a child in this way is a wonderful way of showing a child and his or her family that someone truly cares.

What Is So Special About Compassion International Child Sponsorship?

We all know that there are many child sponsorship nonprofits, and you no doubt have seen many TV and Internet ads appealing to you to sponsor a child, with displays a pictures of individual children and contact information for the nonprofit. Aside from the sad fact that funds donated to too many of these nonprofits may be mismanaged and that many of them may not even reach those children, many seem to focus mostly on basic physical needs. That is better than no help for these suffering children. Compassion International is unsurpassed not only in their financial ethics and accountability, in my opinion, they focus on the complete development of their sponsored children: physical, social, material, emotional and spiritual. As Christians who want to see the world won for Christ, it's especially important that Compassion works hard to bring the truth and love of Christ to children, families, and communities. Compassion also serves the child's family and whole community. You can sponsor a child in Jesus' Name! If you feel moved to share your love with a child in need at this time of year and give a gift that gives all year long, I encourage you to consider Compassion child sponsorship. If you simply are curious about this or want to spread the word, visit here.

The above images are courtesy of Compassion International.

Gossip: A Sin We Christians Find It Hard To Resist

I'm sure that many of us Christians avoid gross sins like violent crimes and sexual immorality, though the news shows the alarming rate at which so many Christian leaders, not to mention "rank and file" believers, indulge in or are addicted to pornography or others sexual addictions. I can go on and on. But there is one sin that I think it's safe to say all of us Christians indulge in too often or feel tempted to indulge in. It is often not even recognized as a sin. I'm talking about gossip, and it's definition is much broader than simply telling lies about another person in malice. It's more than betraying confidences shared with us in trust. If gossip were simply not indulging in the above, many of us may be exempt from gossiper status. Ah, this just isn't the case! I'm targeting this post at myself as much as anyone, as gossip has been a lifelong temptation for me, a sin that I often indulged in in the past and no doubt still participate in. Why is gossip so damaging and such an evil? It destroys countless relationships, including marriages, and no doubt has spawned violent crimes. Gossip has probably destroyed much more trust between people and caused much more heartbreak than most of us have any idea of. It has ruined many reputations, even put innocent people behind bars for crimes they have never committed.

Gossip is not only spreading lies about people to ruin their reputations; it is so much more. It includes the habit so many of us have in simply passing rumors about others, whether true or not. We don't have any desire to ruin the person's good name and may not even realize this is going on. Examples in conversations? "Say, did you hear that so-and-so is divorcing her husband?" You are properly horrified and, without knowing whether this is even true, you repeat this to your close friend. "She found out that her teenage daughter is pregnant," a good friend tells you. "How awful!" you exclaim." Without going to the person to show your concern and verify this rumor, you repeat what you hear to your spouse. You hear an unconfirmed news report that a celebrity is having an affair and cheating on her spouse as you tune into a celebrity gossip show. "Hey, did you hear the latest on so-and so?" you gloat to a good friend. "She is cheating on her husband!" We, Christian and non-Christian, no doubt engage in this kind of idle talk than we care to realize. We Christians engage in this gossip business even when it comes to sharing others' prayer requests apart from their knowledge or permission. "I think we should pray for so-and so!" you exclaim to your Christian friends. "She is battling same-sex feelings!" or "Let's pray for him; he is indulging in porn. Imagine if his wife knew?" We don't realize that saying such things are plain wrong, unless it's pointed out to us. I'm pointing fingers at myself on this too, especially in my pre-Christian days.

We deal in the gossip business when we read magazines, other materials, and view talk shows that are set up mainly to cater to our sick "need" to hear bad things about others, especially celebrities, politicians, and crime cases. We indulge in gossip when we listen to our family members and close friends gossip about absent persons, and say nothing to challenge them. It is called listening to gossip and we, including I, engage in this much more than we probably care to know. It's so easy to do! We often don't recognize when we are hearing gossip, and may value keeping the friend's or family member's approval of us more than we feel the need to challenge them to stop saying things about absent parties who can't defend themselves. It is said, though, that "Whoever gossips TO you gossips or WILL gossip ABOUT you." I think many of us can vouch for this one, as we may remember so-called "friends" whose gossip we listened to, who are NOT talking TO us now and this means that they are likely talking ABOUT us. Listening to gossip may make us feel important, included or entertained, but it is an illusion and it doesn't deliver what it promises!

There's another form of gossip that we may use to handle our interpersonal conflicts or hurts, and it's been called "triangulation." Here's how it works: Someone hurts you by word or action, you are upset, hurt and angry and you "vent" or gripe to a third party. This is so much easier to do than courageously speaking the truth BUT in love, to the person who has hurt or upset you! I know this so well, as one who had, and still does, engage in "triangulation" far too much. We Christians know that we have the resource of going to God and "griping about" the offending person to Him. But we know that, not only is He invisible, but we will be challenged to go the person in caring confrontation. I'm sure that all of us, Christian and non-Christian, engage in "triangulation," because it's just "too hard" to courageously challenge the offending party in a spirit of Christian love. Besides, we may not even do it right, and the other person may not even listen to us. Many people, indeed, are convinced that they are right and will not listen to us. I know this for a fact! In Scripture, though, God rarely calls us to do the easy thing, and that holds true in our interpersonal conflicts. When we are hurt or have hurt someone else, we are called to go to the person and work it out with them first. Then, if that doesn't work, we can take others with us to try to resolve it. We are to keep conflicts between ourselves and other believers within the Church.

Gossip has gone high-tech also. How does gossip look in cyberspace? When people send us hurtful messages or texts and we post status updates or blogs that are viewable to our Facebook friends or even to the public, about the offending user, we are gossiping. This holds true especially if we use their name, even if just their first name or their initials. We may not even keep them anonymous, but is they can read our posts and recognize details that identify them, we may have crossed the line into sinful gossiping. We indulge in online gossip when we read gossiping blogs, posts or comments just to amuse ourselves or to relieve boredom. We deal in online gossip when we read bad things about others and spread these things, online or offline. As I know from bitter experience, so many lost Facebook friendships and even Facebook or other social media blockings, comes from users who gossip or who listen to this gossip without checking with the absent person. We Christians also indulge in online gossip if we post prayer requests without the knowledge or permission of the person who is need of prayers. The ONLY exception to the gossip rule concerning not violating confidences, involves when the other person is saying things that are can be interpreted as suicidal or homicidal. In this instance, saving lives trumps keeping things private. In my view, anything else is just gossip.

Why do we gossip? Several reasons have been suggested. The main reason, as I see it, is to minister to our need to "feel better about ourselves" by tearing others down, whether repeating gossip or listening to it. It is no fun to be wracked by feelings of self-doubt and even worthlessness. So, thinking we'll feel better about ourselves, we turn to gossip. We feel a sick pleasure in "knowing" that others are worse, or worse off, than ourselves. We Christians have the advantage of prayer and Scripture to find reassurance of our worth and our identities in Christ and His infinite love for us. Yet we find it too easy to forget. We need to get it in our heads that we can't build ourselves up by tearing others down! A huge reason, one that has fueled me all my life and even now, is that gossip, in the form of griping to third parties, is so easy to do! It's much easier then the Scriptural way of bravely going to the person in Christian love. Especially, if people have hurt you by cutting you out of their lives, gossip is very tempting and I know this! I have given in too often, even as I seek to please God. In the cases where we are unwelcome in the other person's life, we can still go to God and turn our hurt or our offense of the person, to Him. Another reason for gossip, whether engaging in it or listening to it, is just boredom. It entertains us.

So what's to be done here? As hard as it may be, stop buying tabloids or reading them, and stop listening to talk shows that are set up mainly to spread gossip about politicians, criminals, or celebrities. Would you want your misdeeds proclaimed for all the world to see and read? Stop spreading rumors about absent persons who can't defend themselves. Don't listen to gossip; challenge it or ignore it. Try to go to the person you've had a falling-out with, if possible. Christians, don't submit prayer requests unless we have someone's permission. The Bible warms us that we will be judged for EVERY idle word we say. Ouch! Are you feeling unsettled by that? I am!

The above photo is courtesy of MorgueFile.com, is by wallyir, and can be found here.

You Can Grant My Holiday Wish, Visit, Like And Share This!

I created My Prayer Page to spread the message of God's truth and love, Who is He is and what He has done for us and wants to be to us. Most of the posts here are shares from other pages and profiles that tell of Who God is, much of these posts are Scripture verses themselves. I would like to keep getting more and more new "likes there, so we can spread God's message to more and more people on the Internet. This is my holiday wish, that I will see your support. I created this page for everyone who loves God and for anyone who is interested in knowing Him.

Thank you to each of you who will show your support, in the Name of Jesus!

Lisa DeSherlia

Thanksgiving, What It Means To Me and What It Can Mean

It's that time of the year where we, Christians and everyone else, are "supposed to" focus on being thankful and giving, on peace and reconciliation. I see countless posts and hear countless lectures of the subject of gratitude that seem to scold hearers about "not being thankful." Yes, God has been good to each one of us. He loves us and, in Christ His Son, has sacrificed all things to rescue us from the power and penalty of sin. He has good plans for our lives. I can fully understand why we are so often shamed and scolded into "being grateful." It's forever trite but true that no matter what we may face in life, others are facing what they, at least, consider to be worse and more traumatic events and struggles. I agree that we all need to be reminded that life does not revolve around any of us and that everyone faces suffering and struggles in life. These are undisputed facts. When I was growing up, in St. Louis, Missouri, I was always being told that I was a "chronic complainer" and I'm sure that there was a lot of truth in this. Complaining is defined as "expressing dissatisfaction with something." There is nothing wrong with expressing such dissatisfaction; it's where our focus lies, on what we have or what we don't have. No matter who we are or what we face, we all lack many things we wish we could have. All of us also have many good things in our lives. As my late stepdad would say, "Whatever the good Lord gives you to face, He always balances it with something good."

I'm the first to admit that thankfulness does come hard when I deal with depression spells that I believe to be induced, at least in part, by the long-term use of anti-convulsants. Thankfulness does come hard when I see how many people, who seem to not give God a passing thought and who don't help others, seem to skate through life and enjoy health and wealth. And "preachers" give off the false impression, in their "teachings," that if we serve God and love him, that we will be "blessed in life and enjoy health and wealth." The Bible says that those who obey God are "blessed in all they do," but this does not reference good, easy, fun circumstances. The Son of God, when He lived a perfect life as the God-Man, suffered more than all of us put together, especially in right before and as He was dying a horrific death on a cross. Thankfulness comes hard when I think of the people whom I have helped and shown support to, who have often "repaid" me by removing me from their lives because I had shown them my fallibility. But I am learning that it is by focusing on Jesus, NOT on people, that makes it easier to give thanks 27/7 and 365 days a year. For as long as we look at people and compare our life's journeys, whether they are better or worse, we fall into the old comparison trap that is a waste of time.

We Christians have far more cause to be thankful than non-Christians do. We have all received not only the "common grace" that all humans have and in the form of blessings of various sorts. We Christians have also received God's unique grace in Christ. We have many great and precious promises. We have access to His Presence, every minute, every hour and every day of the year. We have been freely forgiven of our countless past, present and future sins of thought, word and deed. In Christ, God gives us His love that He declares NOTHING can ever separate us from. NOTHING. He gives us His Spirit, who gives us power, guidance, teaching and comfort and yes, conviction, as we need these at any given time. He has promised us Heaven, where we will gain all that we ever longed for here and could not find. He has given us Scripture, which is His message, His love letter, to us. He calls us His children, His sons and His daughters. Yes, I'm the first to say that I fail to remember HIs many benefits in this spiritual realm. But, we must not forget and must always remind ourselves, each and every day of the year.

Thanksgiving is that time of the year when we look forward to "taking a break" from watching our weight and our typical diets, and "splurging." I'm not saying that's wrong! I'm looking forward to eating a bit more this upcoming Thursday than I usually do. Not much. I would not okay using the holidays as a license to drink, because that contributes to drunken behavior and drunk driving, which kills people. It is also the day before what we call "Black Friday," which can be another topic altogether. We all are aware of the hype about that day, with all the commercials. This is a "tribute" to the greed and the materialism of so many of us who insist on shopping as early as possible to save a few bucks. We give lip service to the need to focus on our blessings and to spend time with family, but Thanksgiving, like any holiday, is a time of unrealistic expectations. We confuse "the holiday spirit" with "being happy," whether we mean "the Thanksgiving spirit" or "the Christmas spirit," with "being happy." We forget that "giving thanks" is not an emotion but is an action, and can be done even when we don't "feel happy" or our dreams don't come true.

During these holidays, I'm thinking especially of all of those who are estranged from family members or other once-important people in their lives, often because of greed or disputes. I'm thinking of all those who have lost loved ones in the past 12 months. I'm thinking of all those who will spend their holidays behind bars, because of wrongful or overly-harsh convictions. I'm thinking of the victims of recent weather disasters like the people in the Philippines. I'm thinking of those who are fighting terminal illnesses. I'm thinking of those who are spending more holidays missing a loved one or who have not found justice for them. I'm thinking of those who are being put down as "extremist" because they choose not to participate in the holiday traditions or in "black Friday." I'm thinking of all those who dread, rather than look forward to, these holidays because their disabilities keep them from liking the rich holiday foods or social gatherings. For many these holidays are a hard time.

What do the holidays, including Thanksgiving, mean to me? Frankly, because of my life circumstances, I have often not looked forward to them. Yes, I'm thankful for God, for His love, for my family and my life. For starters. I'm also thankful for you who visit this blog and who read it. I'm thankful for those of you who have signed my autism petition. I'm thankful for each of you who will sign up to follow this fairly new blog. And I'm thankful to those of you who have "liked" any of my Facebook pages, found on the main page and on a static page, of this blog.

The first photo is courtesy of MorgueFile, is by seriousfun, and can be found here.

The second photo is courtesy of MorgueFile, is by Seemann, and is found here.

A Christian Perspective On George Zimmerman and Trayvon Martin

There is a website full of evidence files in every part of the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin case. It can be found here.

I know that I'm addressing a case that has divided the US since it become public, and which still brings up strong emotions. I'm sure this holds true in the Christian community, too, if you are familiar with it. I'm talking about the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin case. We all know the facts in that sad case. One dark, rainy night, a 17-old, teenage, Black teen, was walking in a gated neighborhood. He was carrying ice tea and candy, wore a hoodie, and was in the neighborhood to visit his father. In the course of time, this Neighborhood Watch volunteer drove in that neighborhood, armed with a gun. He took note of that teen. Something about that teen made him look suspicious and the volunteer decided to take action. He called 911. The person who answered that call assured the volunteer that Law Enforcement (LE) would handle it. "Are you following him?" the Dispatcher asked. The volunteer was calling the teen names, and said he was. "We do not need you to do that," the Dispatcher assured the volunteer. Still, the volunteer got out of his vehicle, and pursued the teen. Something tragic happened. The teen ended up dead, killed by a gunshot to his heart. Evidence got forever lost and the case was botched from the beginning to the trial, and the resulting verdict in Seminole County, Florida.

I know that every Christian, like everyone else, has a right to hold your own opinions on this, as on any case or matter. This post is not an effort to get anyone to believe what I believe, which would be futile. First of all, I'm Caucasian, female and I live in St. Louis, MISSOURI. I'm a Christian and a pro-life Democrat. I believe that people have a Second Amendment right to have guns, so they can protect themselves and their families. But I believe, and the evidence shows, that people should be thoroughly screened before getting guns, and that gun owners should not be able to abuse their gun ownership privileges. Guns have been abused over and over, so many times that the victims of gun violence can't be counted. And even perfectly good people are deploring the "race-baiting" of this case and of related cases, and calling any discussing of race relations "race-baiting." The Judge in the George Zimmerman case, would not even allow any race-related evidence in. This, to me, is just one example of many who refuse to admit that racism is still alive and well, and that our broken system does not bring equal justice for all.

I had followed the George Zimmerman case, and I saw that the case was riddled with injustice before it even began. First of all, LE did not even want to arrest Zimmerman, and it took a petition and protests to bring the case to trial. The Prosecutors, whom I believed were incompetent, hurried the case, failed to lay it out clearly, allowed Martin to be put on trial, and did not prepare their witnesses to testify to help their case against Zimmerman. They did little to cross-examine defense witnesses. Zimmerman had far better Representation and witnesses than Trayvon Martin had. The case was full of injustice and showed that the system, which is made up of people, values some lives above others. This trial, like so many others, is less about finding the truth and bringing justice to victims and defendants, and more about who has the most money, supporters and social connections with LE. Trials are more about who has the best lawyers. I was brokenhearted and angry when the verdict was read.

In Scripture, God makes it clear that Judges and anyone involved in dispensing justice, should be about seeking truth and doing impartial justice. Unequal favors are not to be shown anyone, whether it is the rich or the poor. Yes, God allows for those who kill in self-defense, to be able to protect themselves and to have fair trials. They have the right to protect themselves from any revenge a victim's family may want to take. In Scripture, it's clear that we are allowed to defend ourselves when we feel that we are another's, lives are in danger. Yes, this is written into all our laws, which allows anyone to exert "deadly force" against anyone who is seen as a physical threat to self or to others. But the question that remains for many of us and certainly for the family of Trayvon Martin's family, why was this teen put on trial and his killer deemed to be acting in self-defense?

Currently, Zimmermann is having brushes with the law and his actions keep shedding light on who was mostly likely looking for a fight that tragic night that he killed Trayvon. Zimmerman's former wife, Shellie, will not speak about Zimmerman's role in Trayvon's death, but is warning the public that Zimmerman is a "ticking time bomb" and that he "is not the man I married and was not since the night he killed Trayvon." Weeks ago, Zimmerman was accused of assaulting her and her father, but no charges were filed. Most recently, Zimmerman threatened his latest girlfriend with a gun and now awaits trial. To me and to many others, this just confirms that Zimmermann was probably not acting in self-defense that night. Yes, I know that Zimmerman will likely not be held accountable for killing Trayvon Martin in this life, but we Christians know that there is a life to come as well as a day of accounting. We Christians know that God's heart, as expressed in the life of Jesus, leans strongly toward love, nonviolence, prayer and forgiveness, while not disregarding accountability or justice.

What do you think?

The first photo is courtesy of MorgueFile.com. The first photo is by jclk8888.

The first photo can be found here.

The second photo is courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

The second photo is by wallyir.

The second photo can be found here.

There is a website that is full of evidence files in every aspect of the George Zimmerman/Trayvon Martin case. It can be found here.

Christian Discipleship, Social Networking and Unfriending

Friends. Friendship. We Christians have, along with most other people, understood these words differently from yesterday. In the past, we referred to friends as people who we trusted, shared our core values in common with, did things with and for. We saw these friends, the closer the better, as ends in themselves and not means to any end. We did not use the word easily or lightly; we cherished our friends. Today, with the advent of social networking, things have shifted. We now use the word friend to refer to anyone, in any social network, who connects with our profile in that network. In some networks, we call them followers, as on Twitter or in the world of blogging. We may call them "circlers" as on Google. On Facebook and other networks, we now "add" or "friend" people. Their profiles are connected with ours and they are now "friends." We tend to see these friends in terms of quantity rather than quality; the more the better. This holds true especially if we play games, have a product to sell, or are on mission to raise awareness for our chosen cause.

The results of this paradigm shift on relationships is predictable. It is evolving, too. First, the Internet has ruined or spoiled countless marriages. Today, the divorce rate is 60 percent, up 10 percent from the 50 percent that it had stood at for decades. One spouse (or both) will turn to the Internet for entertainment or to social networking for to get support. Result? Internet addictions develop that drive wedges in relationships. Partners tend to find photos or posts that contain shocking information on a spouse, which can result in anger, rage, leading to divorce. The practice of unfriending can harm or destroy in-person relationships. Many of us, even if we are Christians, are hurt by the experience of being unfriended and, if we encounter this person face-to-face, our interactions with the person will be altered and usually for worse. For social networks are us, for social networks are, in other words, people in cyberspace connecting with each other. It is evident that we feel differently about our online friends from those we call friends, face-to-face. It's clear in how we are often emboldened to say many things online that we would not have the courage to say offline (yes this has the reverse effect of emboldening us Christians in sharing our faith!) This is the reason we see the phenomenon of cyber-bullying, and hear about (maybe even see) its devastating effects. Mental, emotional and verbal abuse, online or in-person, are just as damaging as in-person physical abuse. And it's clear in the ease where we hit the "unfriend" or even the "block" buttons on social networks" without feeling bad about this. In face-to-face relationships, we are much more likely to realize that the other person has feelings or that dumping him or her has consequences, whether to us or others. We are far more likely to work things out with a friend, for example, who says nasty things to us or racist comments about another, if we know this person face-to-face. Online, we often feel free to remove the person from our networks or even block them.

In my experience, I estimate that I have lost over 1000 Facebook friendships in my four and a half years of social networking. I have lost these users for a wide variety of reasons. Many were fellow former or current fellow parishioners or acquaintances, who did not care about the causes I posted and that showed up in their Timelines. Some took offense at my political or religious posts that they no doubt disagreed with. Many dropped me because of misunderstandings or conflicts that led them to the conclusion that I was not a good person. Most recently, two people removed me from their social networks for the third reason. A series of misunderstandings led one of them, who claims a devout Christian faith, to angrily conclude that I was not the caring, good-hearted Christian that she had "been under the impression that I was." This person has her version of the story, which I know she will justify. This person and I had shared an intimate online friendship; I shared with her things that I never shared with even any pastor or doctor. Sadly, the deep trust and care that we shared only days ago, are all gone. The second person is one whom I introduced to the first person just discussed here; I had shown caring and support for that second person for years, prior to this sorry event. The series of misunderstanding involved that person indirectly and so that person blocked me. I currently wrestle with a mix of grief, anger and self-doubt about these last two rejections.

As I read the Bible, Christian discipleship extends to all areas of life, including to how we treat other online users, what we post and what websites we visit and what blogs we follow. It involves what type in comments and in emails. It also involves the spirit we have when we hit the "Unfriend" or "Block" buttons on another user's profile. We Christians should post and share posts that lift up and glorify God and that spread the word about the Christian faith. We should avoid websites and blogs that don't glorify Him and that exalt sinful lifestyles that displease Him. We should use our time wisely and not waste our time on too many online games or even online "causes" that are more about awareness than action. We certainly should not have anything to do with cyber-bullying. This includes spreading gossip that ruins others' online reputations. We should not post nasty, bullying, hateful or harassing comments or statuses that alienate others needlessly. We should not be taken in by the unfriending practices that so many users are engaged in. In my opinion, we should unfriend users only when we truly fear that keeping them in our networks puts us, our families and our friends in danger (like predators or stalkers). That does not include unfriending people because they offend us, disagree with us, annoy us, or bore us with their statuses. Unfriending fellow Christians violates the principle of forbearance; unfriending non-Christians closes any doors to sharing the Gospel with them. Unfriending anyone closes the door on caring for them.

Christians, we need to remember and ask ourselves when we go online: Do we keep in mind, whenever we visit websites or blogs, post or comment, that Christ sees everything that we do? Do we keep in mind that, every time we post, leave comments, or hit the "Unfriend" or "block" buttons, that the people we are taking acting about are real people?

Photo courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

This photo is by Karpati Gabor.

This photo can be found here.

Like & Share My Prayer Page and My First Facebook Page, Right Here!

The first page, a relatively new page, is specifically Christ-centered. The second displayed Facebook page is my first page and is directed to a general audience. There is nothing in it or in any of my other content (to my knowledge) that is offensive to Christianity or is meant to be.

Thank you for "liking" and sharing both my Facebook pages!

In Christ's Name,

Lisa DeSherlia

Christians, Your Help For The Phillippines Is Needed! UPDATED

If you have followed the news, whether on TV, radio, Internet or any other means, you no doubt have heard about the massive devastation in the Phillipines that was caused by a typhoon. Yesterday, throughout the past night and no doubt now as I write, the death toll has risen to over 10,000 people. That is, 10,000 people are believed to be dead. Many, many people have lost their homes and their jobs or businesses, going without food and water in waiting for help. There are many people who are still missing. Over 1,000,000 people have been affected by this killer typhoon. This adds up to many grieving families, many families who are anxiously waiting for word about missing loved ones, and devastated individuals crying out for relief. This killer typhoon has been much worse, in terms of the extent of damage and lost lives, than any storm that we have suffered in the US, including Hurricane Katrina. (I'm not talking about the impact on individual lives from any weather disaster as one life lost is one too many). If you can help at all, you are encouraged to do so.

As Christians, we know that countless brothers and sisters in Christ are now suffering immensely and many have, sadly, slipped into eternity without Christ. This worst storm that has ever hit our Planet, can provide a tremendous opportunity for Christ-centered relief efforts, so that many people, in their great crisis, see their need for God. We Christians can support the work of those Christian relief workers who are seeking to bring food, clothing, shelter, emotional and spiritual support and all in Christ's Name. Every Church should take up collections, keeping in mind that the need will remain for weeks, months and yes, years to come. We all can and should pray. Supporting Christ-centered relief work through Christ-centered nonprofits like Compassion International is an example of backing up those who can provide direct aid to those who need it most and meet not only the basic material needs of the people, but their need for Christ as well.

Sadly, since I wrote this short post a couple days ago, there has been more devastating storm damage. There have been one or two hurricanes that have hit specific areas in the country. The latest hurricane is estimated to be even more devastating than Hurricane Katrina. It has been impossible to get aid to many of those in the Philippines because that country consists of remote islands. All the additional damage adds up to, you have guessed it. Many more lost lives. Many more lost homes, jobs and businesses. Much more trauma and fear. In all of this, countless children have been affected. So many have had their innocence taken away from them by what they are suffering. Many have lost loved ones, many may be orphans. Saddest of all, many of those killed by the typhoon and by later hurricanes have been children. Their need seems so overwhelming, with the difficulty of getting aid to these unfortunate victims insurmountable. But we can all do something. We are not being asked to save them all, or even most of them. But there are options for helping in small ways that should be far more accessible to us. We just need to know what our options are and be open to them.

Here are some options. Educate yourself about the crisis at "http://www.cnn.com/"/> at CNN News or at some other trusted news source. Then spread the word, using all means available to you. You can give. No amount is too small to help and no amount is too large, either. You can sponsor a child in the Philippines. Yes, I know that this is the end of the year, meaning a strain on financial resources, because of preparing for holiday festivities. Yet despite our financial pressures, we often can cut out some of our wants to free ourselves to give to help meet the dire needs of these typhoon and hurricane victims. If such a disaster happened to us of the magnitude of its impact on the Philippines, wouldn't we want people to come to our aid in any way that they are able?

You can educate yourself at CNN News.

You can visit here to find out more.

Yes, we can and we need to pray for all those affected as well as for all those involved in the massive relief effort.



The first photo at the top of this post is courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

The first photo at the top of this post is by mensatic.

The first photo at the top of this post can be found here.

The second photo at the top of this post is courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

The second photo at the top of this post is by jclk8888.

The second photo at the top of this post can be found here.

Christians, We Need To Prevent & End Bullying

Tearful Eyes

If you have been following the news on a regular basis, in this past decade, you are more or less aware of bullying in our schools. You have been made aware of cyber-bullying. All children, especially those who identify themselves as Gay/Lesbian/Bisexual/Transgender (GLBT) children and teens are especially vulnerable to vicious, sustained bullying. The type that makes a children want to end his/her life. In fact, many have! Those who have ended their lives to "bullycide" have been children and teens who have "come out" as GLBT or been believed to be GLBT. I'm aware of some controversies of a "zero tolerance" policy toward bullying being that if infringing on religious liberty, because homophobia is considered to be the cause of much bullying and cyber-bullying. As Christians, we must deal with this issue of bullying and with GLBT issues. For God speaks clearly to both issues, though the word bullying is not a Scriptural word, nor is the GLBT acronym.

We who have followed the news, in recent years, have seen a 12-year-old girl, Rebecca Sedwick make headlines because of her suicide due to months of bullying. Phoebe Prince, another teen, made headlines years ago when she ended her life due to months of bullying. Phoebe even made the cover of a magazine, but who wants to make a magazine cover that way? Years prior to this, it was Megan Meier who made headlines due to ending her life because of cyber-bullying. We probably know that Megan Meier, through her devastated parents, inspired a nonprofit named after her. It seeks to prevent and end cyber-bullying. And there have been lesser-known children and teens who have killed themselves because of bullying. As Christians, we must strongly oppose all forms of bullying, including "anti-gay" bullying, just as strongly as we are to speak out against any other sin. Bullying, even according to common sense, violates any sense of compassion, empathy, and acceptance of others. By bullying we mean a sustained pattern of behavior that harms victims emotionally, not just single unkind or nasty words or actions.

When I was growing up in the 1970's and in St. Louis, Missouri, bullying was seen as a "rite of passage." Well, that is, it was as compared to today. As a teen, I experienced my share of bullying at a church-based school that I had attended for one or two years. But the bullying did not get as severe and chronic as it had been at a public middle school I was sent to in 1974. I know I was an easy bullying target for school bullies to vent their aggressions and frustrations out on. When I was growing up, I behaved differently and moved rather differently, explaining that. My peers called me vicious names which aren't fit to be put into print. They hit me, punched me, tripped me, stole my lunch money and even chased me home. Once time (that I remember of) two girls caught up with me after class, knocked me to the ground and when I hauled myself up, they chased me home from school. Eventually my mom and my late stepdad found out, and they took me to the local police station. They were told, "I discouraging you from pressing any charges against the girls. You wouldn't, if you only knew what these girls go through at home." This just told me that bullying was not a big deal, certainly not the law enforcement.

The following year, I was in for an unpleasant surprise. As though I had been the problem and the one to blame, I was placed in St. Louis County Special School District. In the past, I had been placed in special classes and in one residential home for children, but never in a public special setting. This time, I was told that I was so placed "for your safety and because teachers could not protect you." I was given the educational label, "behaviorally disordered," which I resented. It was done because my placement had to be justified and because I was, far from being aggressive, withdrawn in conduct. The majority of my special education peers were aggressive and acted out. I developed "an attitude" toward this setting and them, growing defensive and suspicious and with trust issues. I had finished out the rest of my school career in Special School District and in other special placements. I entered adulthood with similar fears, anxieties and insecurities similar that I still battle to this day, and I'm in my 50's. Make no mistake about it, bullying causes long-term emotional damage and is as scarring as any other form of abuse; it's sad that it takes suicides of bullying victims to get us to take it seriously.

When I was growing up, no one, young or old, "came out" about their sexual orientation. So bullying motivated by homophobia was virtually unknown. But because we live in a different day and age, people of all ages, including teens and even children, are "coming out." And when they do, they often experience vicious bullying and hate. Though we as Christians are to oppose homosexuality, this DOES NOT mean that we are to condone or ignore the vile, hate-filled bullying of GLBT people, including children! Bullying, like any abuse, springs from hate, spite, anger, and a lack of empathy for the feelings and rights of others. Like any abuse, bullying is ungodly, unScriptural and unChristike. No matter who it is directed at! Fear of the violation of our religious liberties should not keep us from opposing bullying, including of GBLT people. It is right and God-pleasing to denounce all bullying.

Much bullying and cyber-bullying can be prevented from happening in the first place. Christian moms and dads, love your children unconditionally and raise them to derive their worth in Christ, and to be caring, compassionate and kind. Try to never let them walk alone, where they are easy prey for bullies and predators. Supervise their online activity (best of all, try to restrict their access to it). If your child is reported as a bully or reports being bullied, take it seriously. Teachers and educators, believe reports of bullying, hold the bullies accountable and get victims support (which does not include a segregated special school setting). Churches and pastors, do not be afraid to address bullying, including bullying of GLBT people. For bullying affects Christians, including Christian children. You know how Jesus treated disreputable people, sinners and outcasts with respect, compassion and care. How would He deal with today's bullying of people, especially those with differences?

Photo Courtesy of MorgueFile.com.
Photo by Shakira.

This photo can be found here.

You Can Help A Christian Wife and Mom In Pakistan

Imagine what it is like to live in a country where standing up for your Christian faith is illegal and can get you a prison sentence and worse, death. Imagine being separated from your family, including your children. Imagine being accused of "blasphemy" because of standing up for your Christian faith instead of for the Muslim beliefs that you were raised in. Imagine being given the death penalty because, in so doing this, you are considered a traitor. Imagine living in a country where there is a state religion, it was the one you were raised in but is no longer the one you find meaningful for your life. Imagine not being able to freely practice or speak up for your faith because your faith is a minority religion and the state religion is the only one that is legal to practice or stand for. Imagine wasting away in prison, not because you have done anything wrong, but because you have stood up for what you believed to be right. Imagine not having idea what your future. Imagine being stripped of your voice, and being totally dependent on a caring worldwide Christian community to advocate for you so you can freely practice your faith and see your family again.

This is the sad plight of a Christian wife and mother. Her name is Asia Bibi. Asia is only one of many Christians all over the world who live in restricted countries where they face government harassment, fines, imprisonment and even death, for practicing or standing up for their faith. Many countries are restricted in the sense that they have state religions like Islam, or are Communist countries. Those who say that Christians no longer face severe persecution for their faith are wrong. This is fortunately true in North America and throughout Europe, where severe, physical persecution is mostly unknown. But with the outlawing of any Christian expression in public schools at all levels, and in other public places, I wonder if we are actually truly "free." At least we don't have the fear of facing government harassment, fines, prison or even death, for practicing our faith in private settings. We are free to attend church services, gather with other believers, pray, and serve in our communities in Jesus' Name. We are at least tolerated by our governments, if not embraced.

This is the situation of Asia Noreen Bibi, a Christian wife and mother in Pakistan. Asia is a Muslim-background believer, having been raised in Pakistan's state religion, Islam. Asia, at one point. come to know God through Christ and converted to the Christian faith. Doing this is considered a crime, as Islam is Pakistan's state religion. Once, when Asia stood up for her faith, she was accused of "blasphemy," arrested, charged with a crime and convicted. She was sentenced to prison and the death penalty. Renouncing Islam for any "minority religion," including the Christian faith, is considered "blasphemy" in Muslim-dominated countries. This "blasphemy" is considered a rejection of the Islam god, Allah. This is in and of itself evidence that Islam does NOT see all of us as "praying to the same god." (We Christians must be clear on the fact that it is heresy to claim that all of us, whether Christian, Jew, Muslim, Hindu, Buddhist, or any other religion, all "bow the knee to the same god." (Jesus made THAT clear). Aside from that, Asia is only ONE example of many Christians in Muslim countries who are charged or convicted of "blasphemy" for bravely practicing and speaking up for their Christian faith. Asia's individual plight is one that has been made public and should increase awareness of worldwide persecution of Christians.

It was several years ago that my awareness of Asia Bibi was raised through a Christian nonprofit, VOM had, several years ago, began a petition drive on their own platform and their goal is at least 1,000,000 signatures. It can be found here. You can educate yourself more about Asia Bibi there. This brave Christian wife and mom has been separated from her family for years and her children have been without their mom's love and guidance. No Christian finds it a happy or comfortable thing to know that millions of our brothers and sisters in Christ are facing government harassment, fines, imprisonment and even death, just because they practice their Christian faith, pray, own and distribute Bibles, and share their faith. It makes us feel overwhelmed and helpless. But we can help Asia Bibi, one Christian wife and mom, by educating ourselves about her, spreading the word of her plight, and signing her petition here. While there are other petitions for her, this one at VOM is the primary one and worthy of your signatures and shares.

Those of us in the free world, in North America and in Europe, are blessed in having and enjoying our religious liberty. True, it has become "freedom from religion," but we do not have to deal with the severe issues of so many fellow Christians throughout the world. Those of you who feel led by God to help them more, can educate yourselves a lot and find out how you can help. You can visit here. Please sign Asia Bibi's petition. Can they count on you?

Photo courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

Photo by hotblack.

This photo can be found here.

Should Christians Get Involved In Public Advocacy?

Advocacy. We all have heard this word. There are many causes. Human rights causes. Public health causes. Animal rights causes. Lobbying government officials to change laws for the sake of the public. There is no shortage of causes because of all the existing needs in our fallen world. In a perfect world, causes would not exist. Advocacy would not exist. What IS advocacy? It is defined as speaking up on behalf of those who cannot speak up for themselves. Those whose needs aren't being met. Those of us with the Christian worldview see ourselves primarily as having a relationship with God through faith in Jesus. We see ourselves as disciples and witnesses of God's truth and love to the world who needs Him. This translates to prioritizing cultivating our relationship with God, building ourselves up through being with other believers and sharing our faith. As it should be according to the Scriptures.

So where does public advocacy fit in? In the denomination of my childhood and most of my adulthood, public advocacy on the part of Christians is frowned on. Here's my experience: I began to use social networks years ago to raise awareness about missing person cases and soon I was bringing awareness to autism and related, invisible disabilities as well as human rights abuses. I would post these issues to my personal account. On Facebook, I had added many of my past and (then) current fellow churchgoers, as "friends". These were people from past and present congregations in St. Louis, Missouri. Apparently most of them did not want to see such posts in their Facebook Newsfeeds. I was saddened and yes, angry to find myself being "unfriended" by one of them after the other. I know that they aren't bad, uncaring people, though at the time, I ranted and called them "hypocrites" for refusing to "walk their talk." I know that it is what this church body has taught them (and me) about public advocacy and that it is NOT a priority for Christians. This church body in question (like I'm sure others) forbid churches to officially get involved in public advocacy. They do not forbid individual Christians from public advocacy. But many of these Christians confuse congregational involvement and individual involvement.

As a mom of an autistic daughter and a suspected autistic (awaiting diagnosis results) myself, I began an autism petition two years ago. It is found at Change.org. It is also found at Signon.org, where I launched it a year later. This petition calls on the US President and the US Congress to send funds to all 50 states so they can offer autism services to all who need them. I have been saddened at the lack of support for this petition from those in my local church, with only a few exceptions. Months ago, I emailed the pastor of a congregation I belonged to at the time, appealing to him to let our congregation back up this effort as a congregation. I did not realize that this denomination forbids its churches from getting involved in public advocacy, and he made it clear in his reply that our congregation could not back up my efforts. When I appealed to him to do so, he did sign the petition as an individual. But I fear that many, many Christians may believe that they should not get involved in public advocacy even as individuals. Many may see it as a separation of Church and State or that it is not a priority for us as Christians. I understand this. But seeing that there are so many people whose needs aren't getting met and who can't speak up for themselves should give us pause, right?

Yes, I know that so many of these fellow churchgoers who have removed me from their Facebook social networks justified their actions. They no doubt see their walks with God, building themselves up in faith and sharing it with the world, as incompatible with public advocacy. They no doubt see it as getting in the way. Sadly, some may simply choose to remain ignorant about issues that I was trying to bring awareness to. Only they and God know what apply to their cases. I'm sure they may mean well, though I think they are sadly mistaken. I guess they see public advocacy as being incompatible with worship, discipleship, and being witnesses. Why? They don't see God as caring about crime, missing person cases, human rights, disability awareness, and the rest? Doesn't He care about these many people who need advocates, whether you're talking about the unborn, those with disabilities, crime victims, missing persons, persecuted believers, and others? Can prayer, worshipping and witnessing, in and of themselves, meet the needs of these vulnerable people groups? I agree that we ought to pray and that all our advocacy should start with prayer. And these people need to get their spiritual needs met through the sharing of our faith. But without the meeting of their practical needs, these aren't enough! We are told that "Faith without works are dead," but I think many Christians forget that.

I know that not all denominations frown on public advocacy and that some "Christian left" church bodies go the other way. They wrongly de-emphasize the priority of worship, discipleship, and being witnesses. They overemphasize public advocacy! That, too, is equally as bad and as mistaken. I'm blogging from the angle of public advocacy as right for Christians because of my experience. For most of my life, I was in churches to the far "Christian right" and very conservative for many people's tastes. Whatever tradition you came from, as a Christian and are in now, know this: Public advocacy can be a part of your Christian life if you feel passion and a Divine call for it. You can and should start, continue and end all your advocacy efforts with worship, in prayer, and as witnesses. By the way, if you want to advocate, you can do it right here. Please sign my autism petition here. Please sign it too! Thank you and God's blessings!

Photo Courtesy of MorgueFile.com.

Photo by kconners.

This photo can be found here.

Christians Confront Crime and Missing Persons

          Missing. Vanished. Disappeared. Lost. Gone. These are scary, ugly words that describe people who, for various reasons, find themselves unfortunate enough to become unaccounted for and are not able to be found without help. It seems that, if we follow the news, especially online, that we see one case after another, of men, women, and children who vanish. Those of us who operate in the "world of the missing," whether as family members, professionals, volunteers or advocates, see literally one person after another, be reported as missing. And this does not take into consideration all of those who are not even reported as missing! People of all ages, and from all walks of life, of all races and ethnicities, go missing. Boys are as likely to vanish as girls; men are as likely to disappear as women. Having a missing loved one can happen to anyone at any time. And as Christians, we are called to be voices for the voiceless. Yet I believe that awareness of this epidemic is pretty absent in the Church as pastors and people rightly stress worship, discipleship and evangelism. I know this by experience, as a parishioner cased in St. Louis, Missouri and seeing apathy and ignorance when I've tried to inform local Christians.
          The epidemic of missing persons is so HUGE that I currently have three Facebook pages, including one just for missing children and one just for missing adults. Every time I log into Facebook and scroll through my Newsfeed or Facebook pages feed, I see one missing person case after another! Along with all those missing children and missing adults that do not get solved, are the many, many new cases that emerge. This does not even count all those missing children or adults who are never reported to authorities as such! And sadly, no doubt many in the Church are personally affected in some way or other by this, by experience or knowing other families or victims.
          I have "friended" many profiles on Facebook, that have been set up for missing people and they make up roughly half of my social network; these profiles are set up by family members and advocates, so missing persons posts show up on my homepage with alarming and heartbreaking frequency. It is the case of Lindsey Baum, who is pretty close in age to my own daughter, who got me fired up about this issue. Lindsey, who vanished on June 26, 2009, was almost 11 at the time and is still missing! Missing people are likely to never go away, nor the need for awareness. And for the sake of those who are not familiar with missing people, let me explain the issues surrounding them and how they apply to all of us and why this concerns us all.
          The first, and most simple reason people go missing is miscommunication about whereabouts. When, in any situation, one of us fails to let others know where we are going and where we can be reached, whether we are going for a few blocks, a few milies, out of our country, or even our state or country, it is possible for others to "lose us." For example, over four years ago, the media covered a heartbreaking story of couple in an affluent neighborhood who "lost" their baby because each parent assumed their child was with the other parent (and so was safe). Tragically, the child had vanished and his poor little body was found. This was all because of a misunderstanding, and don't we all have those? I know I do! But this couple was unfortunate enough to pay for theirs by the loss of a child. And this sort of missing person scenario is probably more common that we will ever know; isn't this one more incentive for communicating, especially concerning whereabouts, ours or others' in our care?
          A second reason people, both children and even adults, go missing is because they run away, that is they vanish by choice. Most missing people, especially minors, we are told, are runaways. Though most are found safe, many other runaways encounter foul play as they go on the run; they may end up raped or even murdered; most who run into foul play become victims of human trafficking, especially in the teen years. Thrownaways, those who are not reported as missing, also are just as much at-risk as runaways, of running into foul play. Human trafficking is a big issue surrounding missing people, as many of them are believed to be in the sex slavery trade (not the only form of human trafficking, which includes adoption trafficking or domestic servitude). Since many of us are parents of children ages 10-25 (considered to be most at-risk of becoming victims of human trafficking), we ought to be very concerned about this matter. This is a depraved, sick industry and it is a powerful incentive to drill into children that running away is NOT the solution to problems at home; it is also a big incentive to create a home balanced with the right mix of love and discipline so they the young will not even want to run away! For runaways cannot be assumed to be safe, though most missing children who are found safe, are runaways. And running away is not confined to children. Adults have also been known to vanish willingly. I understand that an average runaway, within the first 24 hours, is likely to be approached by a pimp. A few years ago, in regards to one adult voluntary disappearance, I read a book called Exit the Rainmaker, written by a woman whose husband ran away, and began a "new life" in Europe, moving from country to country. Tiffany Tehan is a recent case; an active parishioner and a mother, she ran off and was found with a man. We adults also need to lead by example, showing the young that running away from problems is not the way to solve anything. By facing our adult responsibilities, including caring for these children, jobs, homemaking, bills, or whatever we are called to do, we show them that running away is "uncool." And we spare loved ones and our communities unneeded anxiety, anguish as well as expenses of looking for us. We may even be saving our own lives!
          Many children vanish because of family abductions where the non-custodial parent (who does not have child custody) kidnaps them and harbors them unlawfully, often out of vindictiveness toward the other parent and as a way to "get back at" them. This kidnapped child is normally found safe but cannot be assumed to be so, especially when the non-custodial parent is known to be abusive, as in the high-profile, sad case, over a year ago, of little 8-year-old Aja (pronounced Asia) Johnson, who was taken by her stepfather and was found dead  (He had killed his ex-wife, Aja's mother beforehand). Years ago, I saw the tear-jerker, "When Andrew Came Home," about a 6-year-old boy who was kidnapped by his non-custodial father, and was found 5 years later. However, as often happens in the case of parental abductions, his father had turned Andrew against his mother, so he came home with deep fear and hate toward her. Fortunately, that story has a happy ending. Sadly, not only do such children come home, brainwashed, but sometimes the custodial parent never sees them again.  I read that rage-filled parents use parental kidnapping as a weapon to hurt the other parent, and are getting more blatant about actually hurting the children they kidnap. So children who are kidnapped by a family member should not be assumed to be safe! We parents need to realize that, even if our partner hurts us, using a child to "even the score" solves nothing!
          And then people, especially children, teens and young adults, vanish because they are abducted by acquaintances or by strangers. In this case, the missing person is more likely to be found dead and what happens to them normally happens within the first three hours. Abductors may take their victims to hold them captive, whether for a few minutes, a few hours, a few days, for months or even years, and this is when they are likely to be found alive. Long-term kidnapping survivors, like Elizabeth Smart, found alive after 9 months, or Jaycee Dugard, who was found alive after 18 years, are notable exceptions. People who vanish because of abductions are in the minority of the total number of missing people. We have many resources today to protect our children from such abductions, though there are never any 100 percent guarantees. We can be thankful for the AMBER ALERT program, limited as it is, as it covers only children whose abductions are witnessed, who are officially believed by law enforcement to be in bodily danger, and who are 17 or under (in my home state, age 16 is the cut-off age). Most recently, three girls, Amanda Berry, Gina DeJesus and Michelle Knight, were located in Cleveland, Ohio. They had been held captive in Castro's house for ten years, more (eleven for Michelle). If you follow the news, you probably are aware of the horrible conditions these girls were forced to live under, as their captor "hid in plain sight." He was respected in the community, attended worship services every Sunday and otherwise moved about in the community, and at the same time  brutalized these three girls. He fathered a child with one of them! Many of us may have seen his sentencing, where Michelle Knight gave a powerful victim impact statement. As Chsistians, we need to pray and see what we can do to help stop these crimes.
          Domestic violence is another big reason for missing people. A common scenario, which we hear about too often in the news, is when a parent, partner, or spouse abuses a family member to death and then makes the murder look like something else, like suicide or a mysterious disappearance. The only way we can deal with this one is to manage our anger (often easier said than done) and to find ways to prevent and end all forms of abuse in our communities. So much has been said about child abuse and spousal abuse that I need not go into it here. The sad stories about missing children or adults vanishing, and then being found dead (or not at all) and where spouses or parents are implicated, are far too numerous to list! Domestic violence by wives or girlfriends has become almost as common as that by husbands or boyfriends. On Investigation Discovery (ID), the sheer volume of solved cases covered there show how HUGE domestic violence missing persons/murder cases are! It seems to be getting worse, too! ID series like "Southern-Friend Homicide" and "Deadly Women" and the Oxygen series "Snapped" are just a sample of how epidemic murders are! Countless cases are featured on TV. Will it ever end?
          A final reason that people of all ages vanish is because they have special needs, especially cognitive differences, like amnesia, strokes, dementias, mental illness, autism, suicidal urges,or other such issues, that causes them to "wander off" or to "elope" where they are at-risk of bodily harm or foul play. Disabilities are often a big issue that surround missing people, but I fear that it is seen as a separate issue, for some reason. AMBER ALERT, the national program that has saved so many children's lives, does not cover anyone but minor children who have not only been abducted but whose abductions have been witnessed. The program does not cover children (and certainly not adults) with special needs who wander. There have been many recent cases of autistic children who have wandered off and whose bodies have been tragically found in bodies of water. The only answer I see for this is to seek to protect such people in such a way that takes into consideration their special situations while giving them some measure of independence. Yes, this is easier said than done!
          Christian brothers and sisters, you are being challenged to see what God may want of you concerning this. How will you respond?
         Below I provide links to helpful resources and I hope you will check them out. And if you have a missing loved one, please know that you are not alone and that there are many resources for you and people who care. If you are simply seeking to educate yourself about this, these resources will educate you to toward prevention and reducing your risks of having a loved one vanish. And if you want to help, there are options for that, too. Shouldn't getting informed about this and maybe getting involved be part of ministry?
         We all can help bring missing people home!

I now have three Facebook pages because of the enormity of this epidemic. Please visit each of the links and "like" each page if you are a Facebook user.

Missing Kids

Missing Adults

Awareness For Missing and Unidentified People

National Domestic Violence Hotline, 24 hours a day and 7 days a week, translatable in 170 languages
1-800-799-SAFE  (1-800-799-7233),  1-800-787-3224 (TTY)

National Child Abuse Hotline, 24 hours a day and 7 days a week, translatable in 170 languages
1-800-4-A-CHILD  (1-800-422-4453)

National Runaway Safeline (formerly Switchboard)
1-800-RUNAWAY  (1-800-786-2929)

National Human Trafficking Hotline
888-3787-888

LostNMissing, Inc..
This is the website for a nonprofit which provides comprehensive services for familes with missing loved ones and also educates about prevention of seeing a loved one going missing.

National Center for Missing and Exploited Children
This is the website for a nonprofit which provides comprehensive services for families with missing children with a database for all children in the US who are reported as missing, and provides lots of information, including how to prevent children from going missing.

National Missing and Unidentified Persons System
This is the US database for ALL missing and unidentified people whose cases have been entered into it. It can be used by law enforcement or by the public; it is considered to be much-underused because people don't know how to use it or don't know about it in the first place.

Let's Bring Them Home
This is the website for a nonprofit which serves families with missing adult loved ones. It provides a comprehensive database for all adults in the US who are reported as missing.


ChildHelp.
This is a website for a nonprofit which provides comprehensive services to prevent and end child abuse in our communities; this site also includes a hotline to reporte child abuse.

PeasInTheirPods.
This is a website for a nonprofit which serves families of missing minority children, children when usually are underserved.

There are other resources which I'm sure you can add!

 
         
         
          No comments: