A Problem With the Holidays

Yesterday, I attended an Easter service packed with people. Typically, we call them "Christmas and Easter Christians" because these members normally attend services only on such special occasions. The music was upbeat and solidly Christ-centered. We should praise and worship God for winning this victory for us at the cost of His precious Son's life! Our Pastor said, before his sermon, as he looked out at the packed room, "This is a Pastor's dream." Before and after the service, we exchanged greetings with those we saw, "Happy Easter!" and we would respond, "Happy Easter!" After the service, a number of us also exchanged hugs. Some people dressed up more than usual. This was all wonderful.

Some Holidays and Origins

A growing number of our brothers and sisters in Christ have chosen not to celebrate holidays like Christmas, Easter, or Halloween. Period. They cite the fact that these holidays have their roots in ungodly roots. Halloween, for example, has its roots in the occult, with so many of the festivities and their symbols representing demonic influences. Both Christmas and Easter have pagan origins, as they are based on pagan idols. The Christian Church reclaimed these two holidays, setting December 25 as Jesus' birthday. There is no evidence that Jesus was born in the winter. As for Easter, Christians created this holiday to celebrate our Savior's returning to life from the dead. The Church set it for Sundays, in recognition of the fact that Christians generally celebrate Sunday as their "day of rest." Yet those in the Body who oppose these holidays rightly argue that Jesus condemns making a idols of the traditions of man and teaching them as the Gospel truth. They also rightly contend that we are told to observe only two occasions: Baptism and Holy Communion. There are no Scriptural commands to celebrate Christmas, Easter, or any other man-made holiday. Can this have something to do with some of the problems with these holidays, like commercialization and inflated expectations?

Unrealistic Expectations

It seems that these holidays have a way of surfacing feelings through raising the bar on our expectations. We exchange all our holiday greetings, wishing each other a "wonderful holiday," especially on Christmas and Easter. Like so many others, I went to yearly Christmas and Easter services, where the room was packed with churchgoers. Countless "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Easter" greetings are exchanged. Then, when the services are over, many of us gather with some of our relatives if we are on decent terms with them. When I was growing up, in the 1960s and 1970s, in St. Louis, MISSOURI, my late grandmother would have over a hundred people. Most were people I saw only once a year. I would wonder what was the point? I disrelished the gatherings because they involved socializing and making small talk, which are two things I have never enjoyed. As an adult, because of my family dynamics being as they are, the holidays are a trigger to me and just remind me that my family dynamics fall outside of the norms, at least to me. I wonder how many people are triggered by these holidays, even as we wish each other a "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Easter"? There are many people who do not feel like celebrating on these holidays. These reasons vary widely and include losing a loved one in the past year, being unable to conceive a wanted child, having social or sensory issues that interfere with getting into the festivities, having a special needs child, being hospitalized or seriously ill, being estranged from a family member or close friend, or loneliness of not celebrating these holidays out of conviction. When I check my Facebook on any holiday, I see as many missing/murdered cases as I do any day of the year. Need does not take a holiday. The devil is as active on holidays as any other day of the year.

Learning to Become Consumers?

I don't need to say much about how all the holidays have become commercialized. They have become an excuse to spend money that many of us do not really have, to eat food that we know is bad for us, and to even use substances that can kill us or others. As tradition goes, we observe these holidays by often giving gifts to family and friends who do not even need these gifts. This all sends the message to children that the holidays exist for them and that they are consumers. There are so many blogs and articles on the commercialization of holidays that I'm not going into it here. But it all just makes those who are on fixed income, low incomes, or who live below the poverty line, feel left out of being able to "provide Christmas" or "give Easter" to loved ones.

Christians and Holidays

There are factions about these holidays in the Christian community. Both sides, those who celebrate these holidays and those who choose not to observe them, feel as passionately about their positions. We are not commanded to celebrate any man-made holiday, but Christians, as a rule, will keep observing them. My position is that what any brother or sister does about observing man-made holidays is between you and God. It is up to Him to convince you what you should do about it. But none of us have any right to judge those who differ with us on the matter of whether to observe these holidays or not. And if we celebrate them, we need to bear in mind and not forget that not everyone can or feels like celebrating on these special occasions.

Anyone have any thoughts?

Talk About Authentic Christ-Centered Relationships

This is a frequent topic in Christian circles today ,whenever the topic of fellowship comes up. It is the reason that more and more churches are setting up small groups within their congregations. However, when many people come to our churches and feel that we fall short in this area, they leave. If they leave, they may hope to other congregations or leave the Church altogether. Many go to bars or other hang-outs instead. They get may get this need met by going to their hair-dresser or barber. Sadly, many use therapists or even hospital emergency rooms to get this need met. Why do they hang out there?

Think about it. In your church family, maybe even in a Bible study or prayer group you may belong to, what do the typical prayer requests or sharing delve as deep as?

I have participated in multiple groups of different sizes and heard many prayer requests. What does the deepest sharing of testimonies or prayer requests look like? Most of the testimonies or prayer requests center on someone's battle with or survival of serious illnesses like cancer, or concern a family's experience of grief of loved ones and generally loved ones lost due to illness or natural causes. Very rarely have I heard testimonies in local church families or Bible studies that fall outside these norms. Rarely have I heard prayer requests that fall outside those norms. Yes, testimonies about God has brought a person through life-threatening illnesses like cancer or crushing losses of loved ones, and sustained them to remain at peace and strong, are certainly powerful. Yes, we certainly need to pray for those facing serious illness or loss of loved ones. But are these the extent of what we should pray for or testify to?

When prayer request time or testimony time come in Bible study or fellowship groups, do you hear many prayer requests or testimonies about the following? Domestic violence or abuse? Addictions to substances like alcohol or drugs? Depression or self-harming? Struggles with temptations or besetting sins, whatever they may be? I don't know about your congregation, Bible study or group, but I hear few testimonies from Christians whom God may have delivered from such evils, or whom He has given victory over besetting sins. I hear even fewer prayer requests speaking to any of such issues. Now my research tells me that the statistics are such that we in the Body of Christ are not exempt to these things. Stats now tell us the divorce rate has risen to 60 percent, but very rarely are we aware that a fellow church member's marriage is in trouble until he or she announces separation or even divorce. There are over 60 million survivors of child sexual abuse, which is only a conservative estimate! This is a HUGE chunk of the US population. An estimated six children are killed daily by child abuse. Yet we are virtually totally silent about these things in our churches. Depression and even suicide are rising not only among teens but also among the middle-aged. But nope, we are unlikely to hear or maybe, share prayer requests for someone who is dealing with psychiatric problems. I have heard few testimonies from Christians about how God has delivered them or a loved one from psychiatric illnesses. Addictions are so epidemic that a talk show hosts calls us "Addict Nation." Who of us does not have a friend or family member who is addicted to drugs, alcohol or to something else? Yet I have heard few prayer requests or testimonies centered on addiction issues.

Believe me, it would be much easier to me to listen to those who say, "Just write about happy thing"! It is much more fun to post silly pictures on Facebook and pass on funny statuses. As for sharing, the reason we are much quicker to share about cancer or grief (and then concerning certain forms of it) is because these two things carry very little stigma. People, Christian and non-Christian, universally sympathize with serious illness and grief and are not going to pick up any stone if we share about being a victim or survivor of either. But we know full well that outside of serious illness or grief due to loss from natural causes, everything else carries more or less potential for people, non-Christian or Christian, to throw stones at us. Questions look like this: "Why can't you just up and leave your abusive spouse?", "Why did you let your child walk alone?", "Why are you depressed; you have a great storybook life?", "If you are in a bad marriage, you must be out of God's will" and "Christians do not abuse their spouses or children, use drugs, file bankruptcies, etc.". But we Christians remain in this fallen world and share the same sinful nature as our non_Christian neighbors. I do commend all the efforts to develop and implement small group ministries in our congregations. But being part of such a group does not automatically draw us closer to other Christians unless we make it happen.

Once, when I was inviting people to "like" my Facebook pages for missing persons cases, a sister in Christ told me, "I would like to support this, but it is too depressing. I prefer to pray to God to heal people from these things and praise Him as Healer of all our diseases." I wish that were the extent of our calling, but that is not the way I read Scripture. At a former congregation, I was wearing two pins, one for a missing girl and the other that said "I would be lost without Jesus." A fellow parishioner came to me and looked at my first pin with interest and when I mentioned the one about the missing girl, she said, "Oh, not that one." Before I had set up my Facebook pages for the missing, I had posted cases on my profile page. I took note that locals from my area, many of them brothers and sisters in Christ, had quietly removed me from their friends lists; well over half of those fellow parishioners whom I had added on Facebook are now gone from my networks. I have been told that some said that they had "unfriended" me because they could not tolerate my "negative" posts. I find all this sad. It seems that we in the Church are not paying attention to a wide variety of issues that are probably plaguing many in every congregation. Should we be surprised that many will just leave our churches and look for the intimacy that they cannot find there, in bars? So many people are visiting therapists for things that they should be able to share in the Christian community. I see so many Facebook posts where people overshare about things that ought to be shared in private settings, preferably in the Christian community. One Christian song mentions a person who visits a church, feels judged and is a no show next week because "his sees his chances are better out on the road."

Jesus was known as a "friend of sinners, outcasts, and the less fortunate." All kinds of people felt comfortable going to Him with their issues. Shouldn't our churches be the same?

The death no one cares about

The death no one cares about



I urge anyone who is here to visit this link and read the sad story of the mom of a missing, vulnerable adult whose death no one even missed. This is so wrong on many levels.

Prolife Gun Rights?

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Prolife gun rights?

This is for anyone, but specifically for my brothers and sisters in Christ. That is because of the nature of what this post is about to discuss. I know that the topic is divisive and makes people, in and out of the Christian community, emotionally edgy. That is because it speaks to out core values on the value of human life and freedom, and our vision for both. Both sides have similar values on this issue both totally different visions on how to make it all work. I only feel the urge to post on it in light of a tragic mass shooting that happened last week.

Pulse Nightclub Shooting & Here We Go Again

It seems that, over and over, tragedy repeats itself in the form of mass shootings. We hear about school shootings, theater shootings, workplace shootings, and a Pulse nightclub shooting that killed 50 people. Do they show any signs of stopping? Where will it happen next? Sadly, these are the questions we now are forced to ask. We have to face the fact that we are not safe anywhere, not at work, walking outdoors, not in a public or private building, not at events, or even in our own homes! Violence can erupt anywhere, even as the result of an escalating argument. But, brothers and sisters in Christ, we know that our faith is supposed to be in God first, to free us from living in fear and to know that even if bad things happen, that He will bring good out of these if we love Him. Why is it, then, that I see those in the Christian community to be the most vocal and the most passionate in advocating for our gun rights, even before safety itself? "God and guns" is a common saying in some Christian circles. Putting God and owning firearms in the same category? I saw this post a few days ago, framed in general terms and it was worded something like: "My aim is to disarm my citizens" and this saying was attributed to Adolph Hitler. I saw another, similar, general post: "The mark of an oppressive government is the effort to disarm its citizens." It is brothers and sisters in Christ who are in my social networks, who post most frequently about gun rights, especially, it seems, in the wake of tragic shootings. Yes, I see some posts in favor of gun rights by those outside the Christian community. This post is not about "gun control" or the taking away of any law-abiding citizen's rights to own a gun. No, this is about the safe and responsible use of firearms! We should not need to legislate safe and responsible ownership of firearms. Sadly, it seems that we need this! These mass shootings are not stopping. And guns are used in other forms of killing, including other murders and in countless suicides. I know that the case conservative "gun rights" advocates make is that other weapons are also used to kill, including knives, ropes, baseball bats, even a killer's bare hands. But why make another weapon available for killing? That is the question.

Fort Hood Shooting & What Will It Take TO End These Tragedies?

I'm sure that most of you are aware of the Fort Hood shooting that happened last week, at a Texas Army Base. An Iraq veteran, 34, killed three fellow soldiers, injured 16 others. Then he ended his own life. Ivan Lopez was this gunman's name. Now, four people are dead and many the lives of many others are forever altered. They have lost much and will never forget. Yes, we are now talking about mental health, banning all gun rights to those with mental health issues, providing services to those with these issues, and ending the stigma of mental illness. In this case, as this is a military case, our nation, the US, is talking about why veteran suicides and violence are rising, how we are failing them, and what we can do about that. These are all things that we ought to be tackling. But during the Vietnam Era and during and after that war, veteran suicides were not nearly as prevalent. The stress on Vietnam veterans was even worse, as they were drafted into service and they did not receive a "hero's welcome" when they came back home but were spat on as "baby killers." They did not have the support that today's soldiers have, and SHOULD have. Many years ago, I recall that one Vietnam veteran said, in comparing the level of support in contrast to what Iraq soldiers at the time were getting: "I don't think anyone prayed for me." Yet veteran suicides are continuing and show no signs of ending. I believe it has risen to eighteen veteran suicides per day, far higher than among any other people group. The rate of suicide and homicide have also risen among teens and even among middle-aged adults. In earlier decades like the 1960s and 1970s, when I was growing up, guns were not nearly as accessible and this period spanned the Vietnam War. I wonder if our far easier access to guns has something to do with the fact that we have become a more violent society? Isn't this ironic that this has co-incided with the legalization of abortion? Life has become cheaper in the developed world.

Preventing More Mass Shootings, Some Ideas

None of us, Christian or non-Christian, wants to see any shootings, let alone mass shootings. Yet so many among us seem to believe that we need to operate on fear and protect ourselves with our guns. Isn't this what people like George Zimmerman and Michael Dunn did with unarmed boys whom they saw as suspicious? Do our gun rights make many of us who own guns too quick to use those guns when we see anyone we believe poses a threat, even if they do not? This easy access to guns means that people with anger management problems, as both George Zimmerman and Michael Dunn were both documented has having, can get guns and misuse them. In light of this, the National Rifle Association's (NRA) argument that we can save lives by arming all citizens, even teachers, seems to be risky and unwise, inviting those who have anger issues or violent tendencies to get more tools to satisfy their dark urges. Yes, there is much more to preventing violence than promoting safe gun ownership. We need to raise children to be people of self-control, empathy, and compassion, accept and welcome those who the marginalized, support our veterans, seek help for a family member who is dealing with mental health issues, pressure the government to expand mental health services funding, and, as Christians, by covering the whole situation in prayer.

May I hear from you about any of this, even if you disagree?